Flower Farming Business: Dealing with Imposter Syndrome
After six years of growing flowers professionally, I still feel like a fraud.
I know that sounds silly because if we’ve been growing flowers professionally and selling to florists and designing for wedding, then we technically can’t be “fake” flower farmers, but I still feel it.
Why do I feel that way?
There’s the fact that we don’t have a huge acreage that we grow on (we’re growing on ¼ of an acre).
We also live in a suburban area, not out in the country with pastoral views and sweeping fields being our background (although our neighbors do have a rooster that crows frequently!)
We don’t grow at a huge volume compared to some. Since water is very expensive and our growing environment is very harsh, we can’t afford to scale up our model because it would not be profitable.
We don’t have a hoop house or a tractors, and sometimes I feel like we’re growing a very large garden. And to some flower farmers who are growing big volumes, it may appear that way.
But then I remember that we’ve been doing this for six years. And that we’ve sold thousands of stems of flowers in that time period. And that we have floral designers who are waiting for our flowers to come into season. And that we have had many happy couples celebrate their wedding days with our flowers (as well celebrate anniversaries, birthdays and baby showers as well!)
But imposter syndrome rears its ugly head more often than not.
So what can I do about imposter syndrome as a flower farmer?
Dealing with Flower Farmer imposter syndrome
It’s important to know that many people suffer from imposter syndrome as flower farmers.
We have grower friends who have been doing this even longer than we have and they still feel like they are not “good enough” despite multi-acre growing operations, gorgeous social media accounts and what I would deem very successful flower farms.
If they are what I would legitimately deem successful yet they feel unsuccessful, then I know that it’s imposter syndrome speaking and not reality.
By recognizing that, I can start to see how imposter syndrome starts, and that is with comparing yourself to other people so much that you lose vision of where you are at.
Don’t Compare Yourself to Others (in a Literal Sense)
I’m not planting tens of thousands of dahlia tubers this year, but that doesn’t mean that I am any more or less successful compared to anyone who does. Unless it works with your business model, it doesn’t matter (and to be fair I would have no clue what to do with 10,000 dahlia tubers since we don’t have the space for them).
But you might compare yourself as you see them unloading the crates of tubers, planting what seems like an endless amount and then seeing photos of their rows and rows of dahlias. And you may look at what may still be a significant amount of your dahlias and think you need more.
Nope. Everyone is different in their market and needs and purposes. Never let yourself compare your business side by side with anyone else.
(This is of course comes with the caveat that you should be always looking for inspiration and learn from other flower farmers. It keeps it fun and interesting and you would be surprised that people still can teach you new things year after year. Just don’t try to copy them literally - that won’t get you anywhere.).
Be yourself
In this world, there are so many people who seem to be successful in your field because you have access to social media.
I’ve seen a lot of copycat business that take their visual cues from big names like Floret or Magnolia, down to the types of photography and the esthetic of the account.
While this may initially work - Erin is wildly successful in her visual esthetic and what she does - at the end of the day if you try to copy her exactly you’re going to end up either 1) looking like a weird knockoff version or 2) be passed over because why would someone follow you when they can follow Floret?
And while I won’t pretend that our photography style and esthetic isn’t borrowed from different sources, when compiled together it is unerringly our own. A weird mishmash of our garden, cut flowers, floral design and the occasional personal post, it’s us, our flowers and what we do.
I say this because we were caught for many years in the trap of trying to copy and emulate other people’s success with flower farming and floral design. We would jump from esthetic to esthetic and try to copy posts from other successful accounts we wanted to be.
And yet, we never saw the growth that we wanted from that. It was only after settling into ourselves and what it is we do best and what we stand for that we truly started to grow.
People are interested in people. It’s just who we are. And if you aren’t yourself - if you’re copying someone else - people are going to like you for something other than who you are and what your business is about.
This can really mess with you, because you in essence start thinking that yourself, your true self isn’t good enough. So you try and overcompensate. And try to keep the facade going.
And is it any wonder why you feel like your imposter syndrome is going to swallow you whole?
It’s better to have someone love you for what you are rather than like you for something that you’re not. Even if it is scary and vulnerable, it is true and real. Keeping up a facade or copying someone else won’t work long term. Trust me, we’ve tried.
Know that you are enough
There are days when I get discouraged. Right now my ranunculus are a month behind schedule, I’ve got terrible germination on my calendula - a relatively easy plant to grow that I’ve grown hundreds of times before- and half of my beds aren’t prepped.It makes you feel like an utter failure.
But you know the funny thing is that I’ve got sweet peas and Icelandic poppies and anemones in the ground. I’ve got phlox growing abundantly for the first time ever, and I’ve got so many other things going for us that the small things don’t matter.
And as soon as I was able to plant out some more and get things squared away I felt much better. That visual cue of seeing plants in the ground was fantastic - just the boost of confidence and reassurance that everything was progressing just fine.
I realized that I’m getting in my own head. Nothing is wrong with me, we are still in early March and I have plenty of time before the growing season starts. I know what I’m doing and I have such a body of wealth and knowledge accumulated from growing over the past couple years.
I have to just tell myself that I am good at what I do, and that this is enough. I am not a failure (no matter what happens with my plantings) and I am enough.
This little pep talk may sound silly, but it really helps. It helps to give me perspective and allow me to realize that I know what I am doing, I have a plan and that things will work out.
Don’t be so hard on yourself. You are a brilliant human and are going to create beauty through flowers. You are enough.
~Kee-ju
And if you’re interested in the other part of being yourself - the part of being vulnerable - you may want to check out this post
